A sadness crept over my hometown this week as my former pastor The Rev. Dr. Gary Byrkit, who was still serving my home church, died unexpectedly. The word spread quickly as heart after heart began aching with this creeping sadness. Congregation members both current and former embraced and wept for their lost leader.
As I began the process of mourning and grieving the loss of my pastor I was reminded of all of the ministers I have encountered throughout my life and there are many since I worked at the regional office for our church denomination. I found myself grouping ministers. There was a group for ministers that were evangelically minded, focused on growing the church. There was a group for ministers that were work-a-holics. There was a group for ministers that were "Bible Thumpers". There was a group for ministers that desperately needed some time off. There was a group for the young, up and coming ministers. The list went on and on as I thought about all of these people that choose to dedicate their profession to ministering the people of God.
Then there was a group for ministers like Gary...the ministers that I hold in the highest esteem. These ministers are the elite. They are pastors, shepherding their flock. They are evangelists, caring for the community. They are thoughtful, listening for God's direction. They are theologians, rooting their ministry in the study of the nature of God. They are patient, encouraging peace and calmness in turmoil. These ministers embody everything that I hold valuable in the leaders of a church.
After spending time doing this I allowed myself to think specifically of Gary. I was surprised at how sore my heart was with sorrow. One of my favorite memories of Gary is of him giving one of his "famous, Conversation with God" sermons. During these sermons Gary would pull his desk into the sanctuary and pretend to be writing a sermon during which time God's voice, played by a fellow minister or congregation member, would talk to him. I remember being young and hearing my parents discussing using gender inclusive language in certain aspects of the church worship. A Sunday morning rolls around, and I walk into the sanctuary shocked to see a desk on the chancel. Intrigue set in, and I began thinking that something cool might actually happen today. The sermon started with Gary "writing his sermon" and he was asking God some questions. All of a sudden God answered back, and this time...God was a woman.
I remember Gary standing at the front of the church being presented with a stole on Children's Sabbath. It was made from the handprints of the children of the church. I can hear him getting choked up at the realization that his daughter's hand had been placed on the stole so that it would fall over his heart.
I remember walking out of the church every Sunday knowing that my pastor cared about me. Gary passed the peace almost literally as he placed his large, gentle hand on my shoulder and wished me a good week. Gary's soul was gentle and nurturing. Gary didn't get wrapped up in the societal changes of the church. He remained true and authentic to his interpretation of God's desires for the church. He was thoughtful and patient when he thought those desires might cause some turmoil. I remember a ministry peer calling him crazy for wanting to make some changes to how ministry was done at my home church and then saying that if it worked however, it could completely change the philosophy of congregational ministry. It worked.
At Gary's Celebration of Life service today a minister stated that what set Gary apart from the rest was that he was a pastor theologian. That he both cared for, nurtured, and shepherded as well as studied and discerned the nature of God. Gary taught by example.
As a minister's wife I say what sets Gary apart from the rest was his dedication to his family. His day off was Tuesday. It was his sacred day and people knew not to bother him on his day off. On Tuesdays, you could find him doing any number of things with his family from breakfast with his wife, to spending a day at church camp with his children. It was refreshing to know that he was not one of the many ministers that chooses the job over the family and refreshing to know that the church respected him more for that choice.
Gary Byrkit will be remembered for years to come. He became a part of the group of ministers that have set a new standard for ministry. A standard for service to a congregation. A standard for love to a family. A standard for care of one's self. I hope and pray that as people accept the calling of serving the church that they will be reminded of the Gary Byrkit's in the ministry. That while in seminary they aren't just taught the lingo of ministry but the true meaning of ministry.
I pray for Gary's family, my home church and all of those that are hurting. As our tears slowly fade and our hearts slowly mend may we feel Gary's hand on our shoulder again emitting God's peace and strength. Amen.
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